and things went downhill from there

Once we decided that we were going to thaw out a couple of the "Beyond Meat" patties we had in the freezer for dinner yesterday (since it looked like it might be our last opportunity to use the grill for some time), I went shopping for buns and other accoutrements. I nabbed a 4-pack of brioche buns, beefsteak tomato and sweet onion for my own burger (atara isn't a fan of much beyond lettuce on her own burgers). As I was heading to the till a niggling bit of curiosity started churning in the back of my head. If this little store carries vegan meat replacements, I wonder if they carry vegan cheese replacements too.

My experiences with vegan cheese in the past have been ... mixed; generally ranging from bad to best forgotten. It had been a few years since my last encounter with it, though, and given how far they have come with meat replacements, I felt it improbable that they'd not made improvements with cheese. I found a small pack of "cheese" slices in a similar format to the Kraft slices, and against my better judgement, I tossed one into the basket with my other groceries.

The first thing I did with the fake cheese was to try an unadulterated slice of it. I set it down next to a slice of processed cheese, and although they were both the same shape and colour, they were easy to tell apart. The fake cheese was like a slice of cheddar rather than processed cheese. It was hard and had clear lines across it from being sliced off of a larger block. In terms of smell - well, it smelled like cheese. If anything, it almost smelled too much like cheese, as if it was trying extra hard.

I tried eating both slices after that. Even ignoring the textural differences, there was no mistaking one for the other. I definitely preferred the flavour of the "real" cheese, but the vegan stuff wasn't bad. If I hadn't known that it was vegan in advance, that probably wouldn't have been my first guess on tasting it. It was mostly something in its aftertaste that just wasn't quite right. It triggered a flavour response that I associate with bitterness, without being overtly bitter. But it was okay - and a far cry better than any of my prior experiences with vegan cheese.

Given its texture, I had reservations about how well it would melt on my burger, but gamely put a slice of regular cheese on atara's burger, and a slice of the vegan one on mine. As I had feared, by the time the processed cheese was nicely moulded to the top of its patty, the fake one still looked pristine. I took the finished burger inside and left mine on the heat for a little longer. After another minute or two, it started to look a bit meltier, but rather than conforming to the shape of the burger, its edges started curving upward. I finally decided that it was done, and I removed it to a plate.

I also flipped the slice of cheese to make it curve downward instead. In spite of looking fairly solid, it was actually very soft when I flipped it, which raised my expectations a bit.



Appearances aside, if somebody had given me this burger and not told me that there was anything special about the cheese, it would not have occurred to me that it was a vegetable product. It was good. I'd simply have assumed that it was a slice of cheddar rather than a slice of processed cheese. Although I have no compelling reason to use this product on future burgers, I would have no hesitation about doing so.

I gave it a second trial this morning by making a grilled "cheese" sandwich for breakfast. Since I knew that it needed a bit of extra effort to melt, I gave it some assistance by making the sandwich over low heat, in a frying pan with a lid. Other than using lower heat and covering the pan, I made the sandwich the same way that I usually do. I melted a bit of butter in the frying pan before adding the sandwich and then added a bit more butter when went to flip the sandwich. Then I just turned it a few more times until both sides were toasted to my satisfaction.

When it was adequately browned, I removed it from the pan and was a bit disappointed to see that the cheese overhanging the edges of the sandwich did not look like it had melted at all. As soon as I took my first bite of the sandwich, though, I discovered that appearances can be deceiving. It was thoroughly melted all through. In fact, this sandwich was better than just passable - this was a perfectly cromulent grilled "cheese" sandwich. If somebody had made this for me without any advance warning, I'd have assumed that they used a different brand of cheese than I was used to, but "vegan" probably would not have been my first guess.

atara took a reluctant bite of the sandwich, and declared that other than not quite having the right mouthfeel, it was not really a bad sandwich. Coming from such a grilled cheese snob, that's pretty high praise.

I bought this cheese out of curiosity, and as an experiment. Neither of us has any (current) health reasons to avoid the real product, but I'm pleased with the outcome of this trial. If I ever developed lactose intolerance or came under my doctor's orders to avoid dairy, I think that I could be content using this product. They've managed to cross the threshold into "pretty good" territory.

I usually don't pay much attention to pictures in grocery flyers, but atara called my attention to this one while we were shopping today.

"What the heck is going on in that picture?"



I can get past the fact that the skillet is about 1/3 the size that it needs to be for the amount of food in it. This is disaster and heartache waiting to happen if one thinks they are going to try and cook this amount of food on the stove top, but for the moment we will assume that the intent is to put the skillet into the oven. Slide it in there at 375 and let the chopped onions and celery cook in the hamburger juice that runs off - could work.

But wait, it's already garnished. This is the final dish, ready to be served. Either mom has gone insane, or she's turned into an evil gourmet. "Grab your sporks kids, it's hamburger tartare on a bed of raw shallots and celery." Mmm. A bit of vanilla and ground turmeric and you're set. It's best if the centre is still slightly frozen.