Rehashed jokes
Jun. 1st, 2009 10:08 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
plonqYears ago when I still worked in one of our Vancouver offices, there was an old janitor who made the bold claim of knowing every joke ever told. He didn't, of course, and he was always up to hear a joke in case it was a new one to add to his repertoire. Nine times out of ten though, one could start telling him a joke and he would stop them shortly into it and say, "Oh yes, that's a variant on this one." He would then tell the original version of the joke which was, almost without exception, pithier and funnier.
As I get jokes forwarded to me in my work email, I am starting to feel a bit like that old janitor. I'll start to read it, and immediately think, "Why did somebody feel the need to screw up a perfectly good joke?" Here is an example from this morning.
This is what a co-worker forwarded to me:
Subject: The Lone Ranger
The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.
Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, 'Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see? '
'The Lone Ranger replies, 'I see millions of stars.'
'What that tell you?' asked Tonto.
The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, 'Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astro-logically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?'
'You dumber than buffalo shit. It means someone stole our tent.
Here is the version that I remember:
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. In the middle of the night Holmes wakes Watson up: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."
Watson: "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."
Holmes: "Watson, you idiot, somebody's stolen our tent!"
I prefer the Holmes version for a few reasons. Firstly, I am of the opinion that shorter=better. Secondly, I admit that I hold a bias toward the first version of a joke that I hear. The Lone Ranger/Tonto joke might even be the original for all I know, but it is no the first one that I heard. That version also seems a bit more lowbrow to me - not that the other is a masterpiece of intellectualism either. Finally I like characters of Holmes and Watson better than I do The Lone Ranger and Tonto.
Anyway, which version do you all prefer?
[Poll #1409257]
As I get jokes forwarded to me in my work email, I am starting to feel a bit like that old janitor. I'll start to read it, and immediately think, "Why did somebody feel the need to screw up a perfectly good joke?" Here is an example from this morning.
This is what a co-worker forwarded to me:
Subject: The Lone Ranger
The Lone Ranger and Tonto went camping in the desert. After they got their tent all set up, both men fell sound asleep.
Some hours later, Tonto wakes the Lone Ranger and says, 'Kemo Sabe, look towards sky, what you see? '
'The Lone Ranger replies, 'I see millions of stars.'
'What that tell you?' asked Tonto.
The Lone Ranger ponders for a minute then says, 'Astronomically speaking, it tells me there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astro-logically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three in the morning. Theologically, the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What's it tell you, Tonto?'
'You dumber than buffalo shit. It means someone stole our tent.
Here is the version that I remember:
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson are going camping. They pitch their tent under the stars and go to sleep. In the middle of the night Holmes wakes Watson up: "Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce."
Watson: "I see millions of stars and even if a few of those have planets, it's quite likely there are some planets like Earth, and if there are a few planets like Earth out there, there might also be life."
Holmes: "Watson, you idiot, somebody's stolen our tent!"
I prefer the Holmes version for a few reasons. Firstly, I am of the opinion that shorter=better. Secondly, I admit that I hold a bias toward the first version of a joke that I hear. The Lone Ranger/Tonto joke might even be the original for all I know, but it is no the first one that I heard. That version also seems a bit more lowbrow to me - not that the other is a masterpiece of intellectualism either. Finally I like characters of Holmes and Watson better than I do The Lone Ranger and Tonto.
Anyway, which version do you all prefer?
[Poll #1409257]
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
I don't know if it's more original, but...
Date: 2009-06-01 03:42 pm (UTC)"Last night, as I lay in bed staring up at the stars, I thought, 'What happened to my ceiling?'"
Then the various other versions all seemed like variants of that one-liner to me.
I certainly like the Sherlock and Watson one more than the Tonto and Lone Ranger...
Re: I don't know if it's more original, but...
Date: 2009-06-02 12:39 pm (UTC)Re: I don't know if it's more original, but...
Date: 2009-06-02 03:01 pm (UTC):)
no subject
Date: 2009-06-01 04:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-02 12:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-01 05:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-03 09:04 am (UTC)I really don't imagine the lone ranger rambling on like that. Was he an intellectual? I prefer the Sherlock Holmes version.