and things went downhill from there

Putting up the tree

2021-11-27T22:49:16Z

Me: Hanging ornaments on the tree.

atara "You ship those two, don't you?"

Me: "What do you mean?"

Tree:

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Story: A Question of Friendship (3. The Awkward)

2020-01-01T19:52:07Z

"Oh," said Twilight Sparkle simply. Though the alicorn's response seemed a bit understated for the enormity of the news her friend had just dropped on her, the princess's brain was racing at the revelation. Cogs were turning and pieces were falling into place in her mind. Her friend's reluctance and evasiveness were starting fit into context for her now.

"It's all so weird," said Rainbow Dash. "I don't know how it happened. I mean, she was just a close friend, and then I woke up one morning and ... she wasn't. Just like that. I started daydreaming about her in ways a pony isn't supposed to think about another mare." The blue pony's muzzle twisted into a bitter grin. "That's pretty messed up, huh? I guess you probably wouldn't understand though."

"I understand a lot better than you think," said Twilight Sparkle quickly. When the other pony tossed her a quizzical look she hastily added, "As the Princess of Friendship, I have made a point to research all kinds of friendships."

"That makes sense," said Rainbow Dash glumly. "Does your research tell you how to tell if another pony likes other mares?"

"Oh," the alicorn said again. "You don't know if she likes other mares in ... that way."

Rainbow Dash shook her head and sighed. "I like her so much, but I don't want to scare her away." She laughed bitterly, matching her earlier grin. "Hey, how are you doing today? Did you catch that game last night? By the way, I like you in the way that mares usually reserve for stallions. What a crazy world it is, huh?" She gave an enthusiastic pump of her right hoof. "What's say we race a couple laps around the ring track?"

"If she's as close a friend as you say, you must have some idea of where her orientation lies," said Twilight Sparkle in what she hoped was a reassuring tone. "Surely you must have seen some hints that led you to think, at least subliminally, that she might be receptive."

Rainbow Dash shrugged. "That's not the kind of thing I talk about with my friends ... obviously. I mean, I'm talking to you about it, but you're a professional." The blue pony waved about with her right hoof as if trying to pluck words out of the air. "I want to tell her, but I don't know how. I mean, in your professional opinion, how would you feel if one of your friends dropped something like this on you?"

"I'd be ... flattered, and honoured that they felt that strongly about me," said Twilight Sparkle, "but I don't think I'd end my friendship with them even if I didn't feel the same way." The alicorn put a wing around her friend's shoulder, led her back over to the loveseat and insisted that she sit there again. "I think you need tea after all."

The pegasus was going to decline, but she could hear by the tone that the princess had switched into "Momma Twilight" mode, and she knew better than to argue.

The alicorn disappeared off to the kitchen and returned a few minutes later with two steaming mugs of tea - her other cup had long since gone cold. "Like I said, I have some books on this subject," Twilight Sparkle said brightly as if the conversation had never paused.

"I don't need a book," said the pegasus sourly. "I need a shrink to tell me that I shouldn't feel this way about one of my best friends. It's weird and unnatural. I'll lose a friend and become a laughing stock."

"It is not unnatural, and you would not be a laughing stock," said Twilight Sparkle sharply. "Nobody is laughing at Lyra and Bonbon."

"That's because they're freakin' adorable," said Rainbow Dash, "but they're a special case."

"No they aren't." The princess pressed on. "Other than being adorable, I mean. Not all ponies are born to feel lov... to have the same special feelings for others. Some mares are born to be with other mares, and stallions to be with other stallions. Some will never develop that kind of feeling for another at all."

"Boy, that would make my life easier," muttered the blue pony. "Sometimes I think it would be nice if a pony could just turn off her feelings." She took a sip of her tea and glared into the distance while that thought hung in the air between them.

They sat quietly for a time before Twilight Sparkle broke the silence. "Do you really wish you didn't have feelings like that?" asked the princess finally. "I know there are books for that too, but they deal in the kind of magic I'm not prepared to use. Zecora might have something that could help, though."

"No," said Rainbow Dash after a few moments thought. "I don't want a potion. I don't want to ever stop feeling this way about my friend because it feels amazing. I would rather feel this about her even if I know that nothing could ever..." She left the thought unfinished.

Twilight Sparkle jumped on the hanging thread. "You don't know that she's doesn't feel the same way about mares," she said. "Is it someone I know?"

"Ya ... sure," said the pegasus.

Twilight Sparkle's eyes went wide as her mind raced through the list of potential mares it could be. She knew it had to be another pegasus because Rainbow Dash had let a comment slip earlier about flying loops around the track. She had also said that it was somebody that the princess knew.

"Fluttershy?!"

"No," said Rainbow Dash adamantly. "Please don't even suggest that to her or anyone else. If it ever got back to her she'd disappear into her house and never come out again."

"OK," said the alicorn. "If it's not Fluttershy, then who is it?"

"Twilight Sparkle," said the pegasus, poking her friend in the ribs with a hoof, "what did I tell you the first time you asked me that today? What makes you think my answer has changed?"

"You told me that it was none of my concern," said Twilight Sparkle sadly, but her mind began to race again. The pegasus had told her something else at the time too, hadn't she? The alicorn pushed that question to another part of her mind while she continued. "It's just that if I knew who it was, I could make an excuse to meet her for brunch - being a princess has its benefits. Then I could ask a few subtle questions to get a feel for whether or not she shares your orientation."

Rainbow Dash stared at Twilight Sparkle in disbelief for a second before her face twitched. A moment later she erupted into a torrent of laughter, clutching her chest as waves of mirth rolled over her. "You?" she said between guffaws. "Subtle?" The blue mare wiped a tear from her eye and then doubled over as the princess tried to sputter a rebuttal, trigging a redoubling of the laughter.

"I can be subtle," said Twilight Sparkle petulantly. She crossed her hooves over her chest and glared at the other mare, but it only triggered the pegasus again. This time Rainbow Dash literally rolled over onto her back and howled to the point of tears.

"You really have a way of cheering a gal up," said Rainbow Dash as she finally regained her composure and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Hey, I don't suppose you have a book on how to tell your folks they'll never have any grand foals."

"Ah, parents," said Twilight Sparkle with a grimace. "I know that pain all too well. At least I have a brother who has done his part to carry on the family line. That hasn't stopped them from keeping my baby furniture and toys for when I add to the royal line."

Rainbow Dash rolled over onto her side and propped herself up on an elbow. "Why haven't you?" she asked.

Twilight Sparkle rolled her eyes. "Because I haven't met the right special somepony yet, mom," she said in a longsuffering monotone. "Besides, maybe Cadence is the odd princess out. I don't seem to recall either Celestia or Luna working to expand their line."

"You make a good point," said Rainbow Dash. She rolled off the loveseat and stood by the desk, shaking out her mane. "I feel better after a good laugh. You know what would make me feel even more better? Let's get out of this stuffy library and go for a fly."

"It's not stuffy," protested Twilight Sparkle. The princess began to raise her usual arguments against leaving the library unattended, which Rainbow Dash shot down with her standard counter-arguments. Their ritual verbal dance continued all the way out the door, with the pegasus winning as she always did.

"I always win," the blue pony had said once, "because I know that the harder you fight it, the more it means you need to get out for a fly, so I argue even harder until you come to your senses."

When they emerged into daylight and kicked off for the sky, Twilight Sparkle admitted that her friend had made the right choice, as usual. The other pony's demeanor brightened immediately once she had the wind under her wings and a breeze blowing through her mane. As they lazily circled over Ponyville, letting the air currents govern their route, Rainbow Dash played her normal role of tour guide. She pointed out things that might be lost on somebody who did not typically see the town from the air.

"Looks like Pinkie Pie is planning something big," she said, pointing down at the earth pony who was arranging pies to cool on an outdoor rack. The little pink mare caught sight of her friends and greeted them with a broad wave. Twilight Sparkle gave an absent wave back, but her attention was focused more on her flight partner. The blue mare was talking up a storm while she grinned and pointed her hoof toward interesting sights on the ground.

The princess only processed every third or fourth word, nodding when she sensed that the other mare was looking for a response. In the meantime, her brain was reeling as she poured through their conversations from earlier in the morning, trying to pick up something important that she knew she had missed. Rainbow Dash had told her that she knew the other mare. She tried to think of who the pegasus had been giving a lot of her attention to lately, when a snippet of conversation floated across her memory.

"OK," said the alicorn. "If it's not Fluttershy, then who is it?"

"Twilight Sparkle," said the pegasus, poking her friend in the ribs with a hoof, "what did I tell you the first time you asked me that today? What makes you think my answer has changed?"

The princess's wings missed a beat when realization struck her like the Pony Express to the side of the head; she did know the mare that had Rainbow Dash love-struck. She floundered for a moment, plunged a few feet, and then recovered enough to hover in place while she settled back into a proper wing beat.

The pegasus swooped down and hovered beside her friend with an expression of concern. "Whoa, dude, are you okay? Do you need to land for a bit?"

Twilight Sparkle nodded furiously. She looked around and pointed at an open patch of grass on the side of a steep hill to their left. "There. Let's land there," she said.

"That's our reading spot," said Rainbow Dash as she dipped to follow the other pony. "I didn't bring a book with me, and I don't see you carrying any."

The two ponies alit on the grassy patch and spent a few moments settling their wings into place before they sat on the warm turf. Twilight Sparkle's face broke out into a sly grin as she looked over at her friend.

"I didn't bring a book," she said cryptically, "but I happen to know about a book that might cheer you up."

"Since when would a book cheer me up?" demanded the pegasus, rolling her eyes. "I don't know who you think you're sitting beside here, because I'm not a big reader."

"Oh, I don't know about that," said the princess, stifling a laugh. "I was going to wait for your birthday, but I have it on good authority that a certain Daring Do may have another book on the way," she continued in a singsong voice.

"NO WAY!" gasped Rainbow Dash, sitting up suddenly in shock. "I thought she was taking a hiatus from writing. Wait, I'm her biggest fan. How did you find out about this before me?"

"As a librarian, I get lists of upcoming books from the publishers," said Twilight Sparkle airily, polishing her hoof on her chest with an affectation of false humility. "Its street date isn't until after your birthday, but I pulled a few strings with the printers." She looked carefully in both directions as if looking for anybody else in earshot, then sidled over until she was right next to the other pony. The purple mare held a hoof up to the side of her muzzle, leaned in close and whispered, "being a princess has its perks, you know."

"Ohmygosh omygosh omygosh," burbled Rainbow Dash as she rubbed her hooves together with glee. "You were right, this did cheer me up." She grinned mischievously. "My birthday isn't that far away, and since you've spoiled the surprise, you're allowed to give me an early present."

"We'll see," said Twilight Sparkle as she stifled a yawn with a hoof. The alicorn stretched her wings to their full length, but only retracted one while leaving the other draped around the other pony's shoulders. The move was not lost on the pegasus.

"Uh ... Twilight ..." said Rainbow Dash hesitantly as she glanced back and forth between the wing and the mare attached to it.

"I can skip the next couple of steps if you want," said Twilight Sparkle, "because I know that it is me you've been talking about, and I already told you 'yes' back at the library."

Rainbow Dash sat bolt upright and put her hooves on her hips. "Wait, what? How could you possibly come to that conclusion?"

"Isn't it?" asked Twilight Sparkle with a tremble of uncertainty.

The pegasus glowered and crossed her hooves over her chest. "You think that just because I've fallen for a mare who's a friend and you're a mare who's a friend that somehow I must be talking about you?"

Twilight Sparkle hesitated. "It seemed pretty obvious when I said it..."

Rainbow Dash leaned into her friend and rested the side of her face against the taller pony's chest, but she still wore a pouty face of disapproval. "Ya, fine, whatever. It is you," she said, confusion showing openly on her face, "but that was a pretty risky guess."

"You told me it was me." Twilight Sparkle gave a rueful smile and blushed slightly. "You told me three times, actually, but I am a little slow on the uptake."

Rainbow Dash pushed herself away and blinked at the alicorn. "I told you?" she demanded. "When did I tell you?"

"Every time I asked you who it was, you said my name."

She scrunched up her face in thought and then laughed. "Huh. I guess I did. I must have been trying to give you a hint." She looked up at Twilight Sparkle's face in time to see the alicorn stick out a tongue at her.

"Or maybe you are just terrible about keeping secrets," teased the princess.

Rainbow Dash laughed again, more heartfelt and like herself than she'd sounded all day. "Are your feathers still ruffled over that?" she said.

Twilight Sparkle simply stared ahead with a blank expression, but her sternness was belied by the extra squeeze she gave the pegasus with her wing hug.

"Ugh. Now I feel stupid for not just coming to you in the first place," said Rainbow Dash in a more serious tone. "I mean, I didn't know you were into ... mares. I've seen you checking out the flanks on more than one stallion."

The princess gave the other pony another squeeze with her wing. "I told you earlier that ponies are born to love in different ways," she said. "I am one of those mares who keeps their options open." She gave the pegasus a slightly tighter hug with her wing. "I was really happy for you when I thought you had found a special somepony," she continued, "but I admit that I was a bit crushed too. I've had feelings for you for a long time." She cast a rueful smile at the other pony. "I guess I should have said something too."

"Ya, that would have sucked for you if I'd found someone else," said Rainbow Dash. "'Cuz you'd have lost out on a real catch. Hey - is this the part where we're supposed to get all kissy and stuff?"

"I guess, if you ... mph!" said Twilight Sparkle, but was it hard to finish the sentence when she suddenly found herself flat on her back with a pegasus mouth planted firmly on hers. It was a long, lingering kiss that had been waiting too long for a quick peck to be sufficient.

When Rainbow Dash finally drew back, she looked pensive for a moment and then burst out laughing. "The others are going to have a field day with this," she said. "I can just imagine what Rarity will have to say about it."

"Brace yourself, because she'll be fitting us both for wedding dresses," said Twilight Sparkle dryly. "If I know Pinkie Pie, she already had it figured out," she added. "I would not be surprised if that's why she was baking celebratory pies."

Rainbow Dash nodded emphatically in agreement. "It's downright creepy how she just seems to know these things before we even do. At least this should stop Fluttershy from trying to play matchmaker for me."

"It's touching how much all our friends care about us," said Twilight Sparkle. She smiled briefly before her expression melted to a wistful grin, and she looked down in thought.

"I feel like we're forgetting somepony..." began Rainbow Dash, but the other mare simply shook her head and shrugged. All through it, Twilight Sparkle still wore a sad-looking grin. Rainbow Dash frowned. "I ... kind of hoped this would be a happier occasion for you," she said.

"I haven't been this happy since I was accepted into the school of magic," said Twilight Sparkle, but she looked down and rubbed her front hooves together. "I can't think of any other pony I'd rather be with right now or ever, but you know me, and how my brain works."

"You're thinking way too far ahead," said the pegasus.

"I don't know how long an alicorn lives..." said Twilight Sparkle. She looked back up and met the other pony's gaze, but to her surprise, Rainbow Dash's face bore a cocky grin.

"Eh, I've got it all planned out," said the pegasus as she stepped off the other mare, letting the princess sit up again. "I just have to earn my horn before it becomes an issue. If you can earn your wings, I can earn a horn. Besides," she leaned in and gave her new lover another quick kiss, "I have the best coach a mare could ever hope to have for that."

"Rainbow Dash, it doesn't just work that way..." began Twilight Sparkle, but her gaze shifted out of focus and her wan grin became a little broader. "... but maybe it can. I just remembered that I have a book for that!"

And they lived happily ever after. Mostly.

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Story: A Question of Friendship (2. The Complication)

2020-01-01T19:50:16Z

Twilight Sparkle pondered on her conversation with the pegasus while she slowly arranged her reading desk back into a semblance of order. It was not like the winged mare to keep things so close to her chest as she was doing with her current paramour, and the alicorn was certain that Rainbow Dash must have let something slip during one of her visits.

In spite of her regular teasing - such as naming the castle library "Nerdsville" and insistence on calling Twilight Sparkle an egghead for spending most of her free time in the library - the blue pony was by far the most frequent visitor of all her friends. The alicorn suspected that Rainbow Dash had a genuine concern that her friend's wings would atrophy to stumps if she didn't drag her outside at least a couple of times a week. Twilight Sparkle admitted that the other pony had a point; given the option of nesting with her books or going for a fly through the country, she would pick the books every time if not for her persistent friend.

The pony mentally replayed as many of her recent visits with various friends as she could, trying to recall if any of them had made a mention of Rainbow Dash having a new boyfriend. She paused as she realized she had been ineffectually shuffling the same stack of papers for over a minute while her mind raced over her friend's revelation.

"I think I'm as excited about this as she is," the alicorn thought. "Who is he?" It was almost too much for one mare to bear. She wanted to rush off to Rarity or Pinky Pie and babble at them about it. "Rainbow Dash has a boyfriend! Yes, Rainbow Dash! Yes, a boyfriend!" Twilight Sparkle blushed slightly as she recalled how her friend had accused her of being terrible with secrets. Perhaps the other pony had a point.

She picked up the sheaf of papers to begin shuffling it again when there was another furious knock at the door.

"Who is it this time?" muttered Twilight Sparkle as a twitch of a frown flickered on her muzzle. She had not been expecting any visitors at this time of day, let alone two. The princess had also been hoping for a bit more alone time to spend with her thoughts, but duty came first.

"Come..." she started to call, but before Twilight Sparkle could compete the sentence, the door burst open and Rainbow Dash swept into the room like a tempest.

"OK, so I ain't got this," wailed the blue pony. She flew a tight, frantic circle near the front entrance. "The book made it all sound really easy, but I keep getting the order all mixed up in my head and I'm just going to make the wrong move at the wrong time and then I'm going to lose a friend and it's all going to go wrong..."

"Calm down, Rainbow Dash," said Twilight Sparkle. "We can go over the instructions a few more times until you get it." That is, she tried to say that, but her friend was caught in a full-on panic and kept talking over the princess.

"...and now I sound like Rarity because this whole thing is turning me into a basket case..."

"CALM DOWN RAINBOW DASH!"

Silence fell over the library with a palpable "thud," and for a couple of moments the scene became a tableau of a hovering pegasus with her mouth hanging agape and a stunned alicorn with both hooves clamped over her own mouth.

"Did ... did you just use the Royal Canterlot Voice on me?" said Rainbow Dash, recovering her composure and landing a few steps in front of her friend.

"Did I?" squeaked Twilight Sparkle. "I didn't mean to. I didn't even know I knew how."

"Well that was awesome," gushed the other pony. "You totally looked bigger when you used it. Do it again!" she implored. "Say something else in that voice. Order me to go defend the realm or something because I'd totally do it if you told me to in that voice!"

"I'm not sure how I even did it," said Twilight Sparkle. "I don't know if I could do it again if I tried." She squinted at her friend, and a coquettish grin slowly crept into the corner of her mouth. "Wait, you said that you would go do things if I told you to in that voice?"

"Well," hedged Rainbow Dash, nervously backing up a step as she saw the princess's chest expand with a deep breath.

"RAINBOW DASH, GO TALK TO YOUR FRIEND!"

The pegasus winced and rubbed her ear with a hoof. "Now you're just yelling," she said. "And I can't go talk to my friend because I can't remember the instructions."

"That's okay," said Twilight Sparkle. "I still have the book out, and we can just go over them a couple more times until you get it."

The other pony shook her head emphatically. "Twilight, you know me - I can't learn that way. You can try and book train me all you want, but as soon as I step out the door it all gets jumbled again," lamented the pegasus.

"I can give you numbered notes!"

"Ya," said Rainbow Dash flatly. "That wouldn't be weird at all."

Twilight Sparkle started to respond, and then she stopped again and a thoughtful look settled over her visage. "Rainbow Dash," she said, "you know how you practise combat manoeuvers in the Wonderbolts? You have those straw ponies you drop rocks on, and do fly-by kicks and the like."

"The target dummies," said the other pony with a snort. "They simulate an enemy so that we can practise fighting without hurting anyone."

"Exactly," said Twilight Sparkle with a big grin. "I'll be your target dummy. You can practise on me until you get it right. I'll pretend to be your friend."

Rainbow Dash blinked. "Twilight, you are my friend," she said, but the alicorn was shaking her head emphatically.

"I mean I'll pretend to be the friend you want to become more awesome friends with," said the princess. "That way you can practise your moves a few times, and if you get it wrong I will just steer you straight until you get it right. You can learn without the risk of getting hurt."

Rainbow Dash started at her friend mutely for a moment while the words sunk in. "That's brilliant!"

The two ponies spent the next half hour arranging the scene for the practise run. The preparations mostly consisted of Twilight Sparkle doing the heavy, telekinetic lifting while Rainbow Dash fussed over the exact layout and positioning of every prop. Both of their tempers flared a bit when Twilight Sparkle insisted that the loveseat was the better choice than the sofa because the latter was too wide, while Rainbow Dash got hooked up on the name of it. The pegasus finally relented when the frustrated alicorn agreed to call it a chaise lounge instead.

"But they're the same thing," the princess had muttered darkly under her breath while ignoring the rude wing gesture from her friend. The final arrangement ended up being a remarkably simple one; the two-seater was fronted by a low table with the awful friendship treatise centred on it. When the stage was finally set, Twilight Sparkle sat herself on one end of the lovesea... uh, chaise lounge and nodded for her friend to begin the scenario.

Rainbow Dash trotted over to the front door, turned, coughed into her hoof, stretched her muscles a few times, and then cantered casually in the direction of the seated princess.

"Why hello, Twilight Sparkle," said the pegasus woodenly as she approached. "What a surprise to find you here."

The seated pony rolled her eyes. "You found me in the library," she said sarcastically. "What are the odds of that?"

"Hey," snorted the pegasus, stomping angrily while her nostrils flared with irritation. "What's with the attitude? Are you trying to help me or what?"

"Rainbow Dash," implored the other pony, "just because you are acting doesn't mean you have to act like you're acting. You sound like a foal reading off a cue card at a school pageant. Just be yourself, and I'll give you hints as we go." Twilight Sparkle reached over and patted the other cushion. "You guys became friends by being yourself. If you want to become a more awesome level friend, you still have to be yourself."

"I guess that makes sense," said the mollified pegasus. "OK, let's take it again from the top." Before she could turn, the princess shook her head and patted the other cushion again. Rainbow Dash shrugged, cantered over and seated herself at the other end of the chaise lounge. "OK, so I remember this part. What do I do next?"

"You could ask me what I'm doing," said Twilight Sparkle. She flipped open the book on the low table and hunched forward as if she were reading.

"So what'cha reading now, Twilight," said Rainbow Dash casually.

"Nothing terribly interesting, I'm afraid," replied Twilight Sparkle. "It's a treatise on friendship by an author who fancies herself an expert on the matter. She lives in Manehattan, and based on how unfriendly ponies can be in that city, she has come up with a flawed theory that friendship is a fixed resource, and that there is not always enough to go around." The mare lowered her voice to a stage whisper. "This is the part where you move in closer." Even as she said it, she realized that the other pony had already done so, and she became aware of the warmth of the other's flank pressed to hers.

"I've been to Manehattan," said Rainbow Dash, "and she kinda has a point."

"That's what is so dangerous about crack theories like these," said Twilight Sparkle with undeniable passion in her voice. "Outwardly it seems reasonable, but you can't just formulate a treatise based on untested, circumstantial evidence and expect it to stand up to scrutiny. She treats friendship like it's some form of energy that can be exothermic or endothermic, but the truth is more nuanced! Friendship comes from within, and it is created from the hearts of all living creatures whenever it's needed. It... uh, Rainbow Dash?"

The blue pony had her hooves pressed to the sides of her head and she was weaving slightly in her seat.

"Twilight, do I have to try and pretend that I am the least bit interested in this?" she said with a tremor of despair in her voice. "I don't think I'm a good enough actor for that."

"No," said Twilight Sparkle with an equal mix of disappointment and relief. "I guess we can skip ahead a bit."

"Phew," said Rainbow Dash. She flopped over against her friend and chuckled. "I like you Twilight, but as Pinkie's sisters would say, you could bore the bedrocks to sleep once you get started. I don't know how much more of that I could've taken."

"OK, now you move on to the next step..." began Twilight Sparkle.

"Already ahead of you, sister," said Rainbow Dash. She stretched her wings and cupped a hoof over her mouth to stifle a yawn. When she was done, she tucked her right wing back into place, but she kept her left one casually extended around the alicorn's shoulders.

"Very smooth," said Twilight Sparkle with a nod of approval. "You seem to be going through all the moves in the right order. Are you sure you need a practise dummy for this?"

"That's because I'm comfortable around you," said Rainbow Dash. "It's way easier to remember what to do when I'm not nervous about doing it wrong," she explained. "If I make a mistake, I know you won't make me feel stupid, and I can just do it again."

"Well, you're doing great," said Twilight Sparkle, giving her friend an approving pat on the flank. "Remember everything you're learning here and you'll knock this out of the park with your friend."

"That's because I've got a good teacher," said the pegasus. She gave the other pony a quick squeeze with her wing, and sat up quickly, jostling the startled alicorn. "Wait, I've got it," said the pegasus suddenly. "You can come with me. I'd be more comfortable with you there, and we could set up some hoof signals so that you could guide me though it!"

"Having me there while you make the move on your friend wouldn't be weird at all," said Twilight Sparkle dryly.

"Says the pony who was going to send me there with a hoof full of flash cards," retorted Rainbow Dash accusingly as she gave her friend another squeeze. "I'd be all like, 'hold that thought, I forgot what card I was on'."

"Well..." said her friend as a hint of a blush crept into her cheeks, "I use reminder cards all the time, so it seemed like a perfectly logical solution."

"Ya, you should totally come with me," said Rainbow Dash with growing enthusiasm. "You could even bring your cards. We make a great team, and with you there, this would be a cinch."

"We would have team colours and uniforms?" asked the princess, stifling a giggle. "We could call ourselves Team Mares Do Well."

"Oof," said Rainbow Dash, wincing slightly. "Come on Twilight, I'm serious; I think we work really well together, and we're good for each other. I keep you from turning into some kind of hermit weirdo who only emerges from her book fort to eat and get more books, and you keep me on a straight path. I probably wouldn't be a Wonderbolt without your help."

"Oh, you'd have made it in on your own eventually," said Twilight Sparkle, blushing again. "You are too smart and talented to let anything get in your way. Aren't you the one who stopped winter so that her turtle wouldn't go into hibernation?"

This earned a nervous laugh from Rainbow Dash. "That wasn't one of my more awesome moments," she confided, then she leaned in close and whispered loudly, "but I'd totally do it again if I had to." The blue pony rubbed her chin in thought and then gave Twilight Sparkle another squeeze with her wing. "But that's what I meant when I said that we make an amazing team. I need you around to talk me out of crazy stuff like that. So what do you say?"

"About what," asked Twilight Sparkle, squirming slightly. Rainbow Dash was holding her so close now that she could smell the other mare's sweat and feel the pegasus's heart pounding in her chest.

"About making us an official team," said Rainbow Dash. "I think we're both better ponies when the other is around, and I kind of want to keep it that way. So what do you think?"

"Rainbow Dash, what are you trying to say?"

"Are you dense?" Rainbow Dash pulled back and turned to her friend and planted both hooves on her hips in frustration. "Twilight Sparkle, I am asking if you would be my special somepony!"

"Um.... yes?" squeaked the princess tentatively.

The blue pony blinked.

"Really? Wow, I thought it would be way harder than that!" She pumped a hoof and then hopped down from the loveseat. "So meet up, ask questions, move in, move in more, talk about yourselves, and then pop the question. You were right Twilight - it was way easier than it sounded on paper when I had somepony to practise with."

"Yes, just so," said Twilight Sparkle, who was fanning herself under the chin with the tip of her right wing. "Do the same thing with him that you just did with me and he'll be all yours, Rainbow Dash."

"I've totally got this," said the pegasus. She extended her left wing and waggled its tip. "I made up that wing trick on the spot. Totally smooth how I pretended to yawn and then wrapped it around you there. That should work, right?"

"Very smooth, indeed," said Twilight Sparkle. "It worked for me." She hopped down from the seat and made shooing motions at the other pony. "Now you should go put that in practise before you forget what to do," she said. "Do that thing with the wing and I promise you he'll melt in your embrace."

"OK. I'm totally going to go do this now," said Rainbow Dash. She held her head high, pawed the ground with her hoof and gave a whicker of determination. "I am ready to take this on." The pegasus trotted toward the door with her head still held high as the taller alicorn cantered along encouragingly beside her. "I meant everything I said there, Twilight," she said. "You're the best. I can do this."

"I think."

"Rainbow Dash?"

"It's fine. Everything went perfect in practise, so what could go wrong?" The mare's head wasn't quite as high, and her pace was slowing from a trot to more of a walk. "I mean, I just do all the moves, say all the things, and everything works, right?" The nearer they drew to the door, the slower her pace became, and the lower her head drooped. The princess watched with growing concern as her friend's walk became a few last, hoof-dragging paces before she stopped just shy of the door with head and tail hanging low.

"Rainbow Dash, it's okay. You'll do great. Everything will be fine." she said, moving up and placing a hoof gently on her friend's shoulder.

The blue pony drew a long, sad sigh and glanced up at her friend out of the corner of her eye.

"Twilight," she said in a soft, cracking voice, "Everything won't be fine. He is a she."

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Story: A Question of Friendship (1. The Question)

2020-01-01T19:47:19Z

Although the castle library was never technically closed to the public, Twilight Sparkle had become very familiar with the ebb and flow of its customers. She knew that the odds were very slim that somebody would interrupt her studies, but if a visitor happened to stumble in during this normally dead time, they would have to resign themselves to seeing its keeper with an unkempt mane, bathrobe, and fuzzy slippers.

The alicorn entered the main library and approached her reading desk with a steaming mug of clover tea and a firm resolve to read the wretched book that lay in its centre. The author of the selfsame tome had given it to her at a book fair up in Canterlot almost a year earlier, but the writer's condescending demeanor and misguided take on the subject matter of the book left Twilight Sparkle reluctant to breech its pages. The pony sighed, set down her tea on the corner of the desk, and pulled up her reading chair.

A Treatise on the Scarcity of Friendship: Proper Stewardship of a Non-Renewable Resource.

Even the title of the book set the mare's teeth on edge. The thought of cracking the cover of the book filled her with mild despair, but she lived by the adage, "leave no book unread, no matter how painful or ignorant its contents." Twilight Sparkle firmly believed that there was as much benefit in reading bad research as there was in perusing sound studies; it was good to know what misinformation might need to be countered in the wild.

Twilight Sparkle had cleared her calendar and even chased away Spike for the day to eliminate all interruptions. Just as she was about to crease the book's virgin binding, though, she was interrupted by a polite, but firm knock on the library's main door. The princess was about to call, "Come in - we're open!" but quickly decided that it would be more polite to greet the unexpected guest at the door. Suppressing a guilty sigh of relief, she hopped down from her chair and trotted over to the main entrance.

She swung open the door and began her usual greeting. "Hello, and welcome to The Royal Ponyville Libra... oh! Hello, Rainbow Dash."

"Hi," said the pegasus. The pony outside the door had her hoof raised for another knock, but she quickly lowered it and stepped into the library as the princess moved aside. "I was, y'know, just in the neighbourhood and thought I'd stop by real quick to say hello." She glanced at the other mare's feet. "Nice slippers, your highness."

The other pony blushed slightly. "Thank you. They were a gift from Fluttershy." Twilight Sparkle patted a couple of wrinkles out of her bathrobe and brushed back an errant curl in her mane. "Sorry about my current state; I wasn't expecting any visitors today."

"Eh, you look fine," said Rainbow Dash with a quick, dismissive motion of her left hoof. She walked around the other mare and made a beeline to the reading desk. The pegasus glanced at the lone book on the desk and frowned. "Boy, that's got a lot of ... words on it." Then her eyes fell to the full cup of hot tea. "It looks like you were getting ready to do some reading," she said quickly and turned back toward the door. "I can come back later if now is a bad time."

"Now is a perfect time," said Twilight Sparkle reassuringly as she intercepted her friend and shepherded the blue mare back into the library. "I've been avoiding this book for so long that it can wait a bit longer. The only reason I have it is because the author insisted on literally shoving it into my hooves when I was up in Canterlot early last year."

"The author gave it to you for free? That was nice of her," said Rainbow Dash.

"You'd think so," replied her friend, "but she ruined that illusion very quickly." She cleared her throat. "I believe you will find this book invaluable," said Twilight Sparkle, mimicking the pretentious tone of the book's creator. "While I am sure you will eventually make a perfectly acceptable Princess of Friendship, you really could benefit from the proper guidance of an expert."

"Wow," said Rainbow Dash, gaping in disbelief. She pounded her right hoof into her left. "She's lucky I wasn't there to hear that."

"I'm sure," said Twilight Sparkle with a wry grin. She knew that her friend did not suffer fools gladly. Just as quickly, the librarian's expression turned serious. "Oh, but I'm an awful host when Spike is not around! Would you like some clover tea? I made enough for two cups."

The other mare shook her head emphatically and waved both of her hooves in declination. "I have to get back to work pretty soon. I just stopped in to say hi," she said quickly. Rainbow Dash glanced at her left foreleg. "In fact, look at the time; I better get hoofing it back to the job. So, uh, hi," she added brightly. The pegasus looped around the alicorn and trotted back toward the door.

Twilight Sparkle was unconvinced.

"Are you sure there wasn't another reason why you came by?" she asked, fixing her friend with a dubious look. "This seems like a long way to come just to say 'hi' when you could have dropped by after you were done work."

The other pony stopped in her tracks, sliding to a halt on the polished floor. She stood for a moment in deep thought before finally speaking. "Well..." she said hesitantly, slowly turning to face into the room again before lapsing silent for a long moment. Rainbow Dash drew a deep breath and released it slowly. She nervously traced a circle on the floor with her right hoof and said, "well, I guess there was one little thing. I mean, it looks like you're busy and stuff, so I can come back when you have more time. There's just this ... thing - that is, I was wondering if you might be able to, y'know, answer a couple of ... see, I've got this friendship question that - eek!"

She ended on a note of surprise when she felt a padded chair slam into her hindquarters, buckling her knees and landing the hapless mare in its depths before sliding her quickly up to the back side of the librarian's reading table. Rainbow Dash found herself cinched awkwardly up to the desk with Twilight Sparkle facing her from the other side. The royal pony was sitting upright in her reading chair with her hind legs crossed and her front hooves resting on the desktop. The princess's slippers and bathrobe had vanished, replaced by half-moon reading glasses perched on the end of her muzzle, with their gold chain looped casually around the back of the neck. The only other thing she was wearing was a huge, beaming smile.

"A friendship question, you say?" Twilight Sparkle waved her right hoof in a circle, pointing at the heaps and shelves of books surrounding. Her winsome smile morphed into something closer to a self-deprecating grin. "I may know a thing ... or two about the subject."

"Uh, ya," said Rainbow Dash dryly. She braced her front hooves on the edge of the desk and pushed her chair back with a noisy squeal of wood on polished marble. The blue mare leaned back in the lush seat, crossed her front hooves behind her head, and wiggled her butt down into the cushion. "Man, how did you score such comfy seats for the library?" She unhooked one of her hooves long enough to stifle a broad yawn. "A girl could totally catch a nap in this thing."

"Focus," said Twilight Sparkle tersely. She was standing now, with her back hooves on the chair and her front hooves planted on the desk. "You have a friendship question, and I have friendship answers. Are you having a falling-out with somepony?" Before Rainbow Dash could answer, the princess continued throwing out questions like a verbal machine gun. "Were you the subject of some gossip? Are you trying to come to terms with a frenemy? Are you misinterpreting friendship gestures from another species? Is Tank mad at you? Are you getting turbid signals from...?"

"Twilight, stop it!" said Rainbow Dash. The pegasus was pressing her hooves to the side of her head. "I don't even know what that last one even means!" The blue pony launched herself into the air and hovered in place as she was wont to do when she was trying to gather her thoughts. Meanwhile, Twilight Sparkle gave a gasp of alarm and threw herself bodily on the desk with her forelegs splayed wide to protect her notes from flying away.

While the librarian carefully gathered up all of her pages and stacked them protectively under the large book, Rainbow Dash considered how to word her question.

"It's complicated," the pegasus said finally. "I've got this..." she paused. "I've got this friend."

"Yes?" prompted Twilight Sparkle when the other mare paused for a few seconds. The princess was sitting back in her own chair again with a quill and notepad at the ready. She scribbled out a couple of quick notations on the pad. "And you had a ... question regarding this friend?"

"Well, so, like, I was lying awake last night - I've been doing that a lot lately," said Rainbow Dash, gesticulating with a hoof at her quick aside. "Anyway, I finally realized that I couldn't sleep because I can't stop thinking about this friend." She tapped her hooves together nervously and bit her lip. "I tried counting clouds in my head to help me sleep - that usually works - but then I realized that they all looked a lot like the friend that I couldn't stop thinking about. Like ... a lot."

"I see," said the princess, nodding. She scribbled some more notes on her pad, muttering to herself as she wrote. "Clouds ... Friend ... obsession ..."

The hovering pony sighed again. "So I started thinking that if I couldn't stop thinking about this friend that maybe this friend was turning into something more than a, um, friend for me, and..." Rainbow Dash stopped and winced, jamming hooves in her ears against a squee that measured on the Richter scale.

"Rainbow Dash," exclaimed Twilight Sparkle as the quill and notepad clattered noisily to the desk. She pressed her hooves to her cheeks, pushing her mouth into a big 'O' of delight. "You're in love?"

The other pony's response was quick and adamant. She frantically waved her hooves in a defiant gesture and snapped, "I am not in love. Love is one of those mushy things that ponies in lame fairy tales do. I'm just in extra awesome friendship with somepony."

"Omigosh, omigosh, omigosh," babbled the alicorn, who was nigh panting in elation. She hopped from her chair in her excitement and pranced in a couple quick circles of glee. "What's his name? Who's the lucky stallion? Tell me! Telltelltelltell!"

"Twilight Sparkle," said the other mare, landing gracefully beside her chair. "Their name is not your concern."

The librarian frowned and rubbed her chin with her right hoof. "I think that I know most of the stallions up on Cloudsdale," she said pensively, "but I don't remember that name. Is he new?"

Rainbow Dash closed her eyes and clapped a hoof across her forehead. "I mean I'm not going to tell you yet," she said. "I don't totally know if the feeling is shared, and I don't want word getting out if things don't work out because that would make it kinda weird for both of us." The blue pony pointed an accusatory hoof at the other mare. "And no offence Twilight, but you're terrible at keeping secrets."

"That's not fair," said Twilight Sparkle, but her defeated tone suggested that she acknowledged at least a small particle of truth in the other pony's words. "Letting one or two small secrets slip out does not constitute a general pattern." She sighed. "You don't have to tell me his name if you don't want to," she added sadly. "But you did say that you had a friendship question for me."

"Oh, ya," said Rainbow Dash. She shuffled her hooves on the marble floor and worked her jaw while she tried to formulate her question. "Well, it's just that ... which is to say, if I have these feelings for another pony and I don't know for sure the feelings work the other way - though they'd be totally missing out if they weren't - uh, what do I do?"

"Love..." Twilight Sparkle caught herself quickly when she saw the other pony casting a stink eye in her direction. The princess responded with a wan grin and started again. "This level of, uh, friendship is more Cadence's specialty," she said, "but I think I have a couple of books that could help."

"Well, duh," said Rainbow Dash, waving at the racks and stacks of books. "Of course you do. I think you've probably got books that haven't even been written yet."

That teased a snerk out of the princess. She pranced over to a nearby row of shelves and began walking slowly down its length, muttering softly as she glanced at the titles and rejected them. "The ABC's of Infatuation ... Stalking Made Easy ... The Naughty Vicar ...Oh, here we go - Lov ... uh, Awesome Friendship for Beginners." She pulled the book from its spot and blew tentatively across the top to clear it of dust - not that any book typically had much time to gather that in her library. Twilight Sparkle cantered back to her reading desk with the volume hovering in front of her as she went. She cleared space on her desk with a quick sweep of her right foreleg and plopped the book in the middle.

Rainbow Dash stepped up to the other side of the desk and squinted down at the text. "So it's all in here," she said, tapping the cover with a hoof. "It's not very thick." Rainbow Dash shook her head and made no attempt to hide her doubt. "It seems like a pretty big thing to try and cram into such a small book."

"The author is very masterful at covering a lot of concepts with an economy of words," said Twilight Sparkle in a slightly sharper voice than she had intended, making the other mare jump back a step in surprise at her tone. One did not simply come into the pony's library and criticize her children - or 'books' as other ponies would call them. The alicorn flipped back the cover of the book and turned a few pages into it. "You seem pretty sure of your feelings, so I think we can safely skip the first chapter."

"Oh, I'm sure," said Rainbow Dash. She reared up and clamped her hooves to her chest. "My heart's thumping like mad just thinking about them right now!"

"About ... who was it again?" asked the other pony cagily.

"Twilight Sparkle," admonished Rainbow Dash sharply with a firm stamp of her hoof.

"Okay," said the other mare, bowing her head and lowering her ears contritely. "You can't blame a girl for being curious." She quickly recovered her composure and paged ahead some more before stopping at a section and glancing up at Rainbow Dash. "You're certain that it's not just a crush?"

"It's not a crush," replied the pegasus firmly. "I'm not a filly anymore, Twilight. I think I know my own feelings. It's not my feelings I'm worried about."

"OK," muttered Twilight Sparkle. She turned a few more pages before she stopped again. "If you are sure of your feelings then I guess it's not infatuation either, right?" When she saw the blue mare's jaw set, she continued quickly. "Sorry Rainbow Dash, I'm just being thorough since this is a little out of my normal field of expertise." The other pony shrugged and shook her head, so the librarian dug deeper into the tome. She paused briefly at the next chapter before she blushed and furtively flipped an entire block of well-worn pages. "We definitely won't need that chapter," she said primly.

"Wait. Hold up," said Rainbow Dash, who had seen the page just long enough to catch the word "lust."

If the other pony had heard her, she gave no sign. "Here we go," said the alicorn. "This chapter covers the next steps." Twilight Sparkle flipped the glasses that had fallen against her chest back up onto her muzzle and quickly scanned through a few pages, humming softly to herself while Rainbow Dash watched nervously from the other side of the desk, hopping from hoof to hoof and glancing up and down between the book and the princess. After an eternal minute of reading, the mare clapped the book shut with a firm slap. "It seems pretty straightforward," she said with a curt nod.

"It does?" Rainbow Dash had jumped back again in a start when the book slammed, but she clopped nervously back up to the desk. "Then spit it out. What do I do?"

"First," said Twilight Sparkle holding up a hoof, "you have to meet him someplace where you are both comfortable. Make sure you have a good reason for it, like a picnic, or tea, or just to be somewhere that you and your friend both like to hang out."

"Find a place to hang out," repeated Rainbow Dash, nodding as if she were taking mental notes. "Then what do I do?"

"Then you talk," said the princess.

"Talk," said Rainbow Dash flatly. She scrunched up her face pensively, and then frowned. "I thought there would be more to it," she said. "What do I talk about?"

"I wasn't finished," said Twilight Sparkle, mildly scolding her friend. "You talk about your friend. Get him verbally engaged about something that interests him. While he's speaking, you slide in closer to show you are interested until your bodies - usually your flanks - are just touching to see how he reacts."

Rainbow Dash paced in a slow circle and fidgeted with her wings while she recited the next lesson. "Talk about their hobbies, then slide over and see how they react." She stopped and frowned again. "Wait, so how might they react?"

"Well," said the princess. She raised her left hoof. "If he pulls away from the touch then it means you are moving too fast - too fast even for you," she added quickly. She raised her right hoof. "On the other hoof, if he doesn't object to the contact, then move on to the next step."

"Gotcha," said the other mare. "If there's no flinch, it's a cinch. What's the next step?"

Twilight Sparkle blinked. "Good idea with the mnemonic," she said, but at her friend's blank stare she clarified, "rhyming to make it easier to remember." She slowly circled the desk until she was standing by the blue pony. "Once you know he is not going to pull away, move in even closer." The alicorn surreptitiously stretched out a wing and wrapped it around the other mare's shoulder, giving her friend a little tug with the wingtip while trying to look nonchalant about it.

"Hey," said Rainbow Dash with a laugh, brushing away the wing quickly. "I never took you for the cheeky type."

The princess grinned and winked at her friend before continuing. "Start to talk with him about your friendship," she said as she walked around the desk again. "Reaffirm your friendship with him. Let him know how much he means to you, and then tell him about your deeper feelings for him before you ask if he feels the same." She paused, and then continued in a more somber tone. "Just be prepared for him to say 'no'."

The blue pony rose up on her hind legs and thumped her chest solidly with her front hooves. "Hey, who would say 'no' to this?"

Twilight Sparkle grinned again and shrugged. "I'm just telling you what it says in the book," she said. She held up her right hoof. "And you said yourself that you didn’t know if it was reciprocated. In the unlikely chance he says 'no', let him know that you still want to be his friend, and tell him that you are open to talking about it if his feelings change."

"What if they say 'yes', though?"

The princess smiled. "Then you have yourself a special somepony, and a stallion has himself an awesome somepony."

Rainbow Dash reared up and clapped her hooves together excitedly. "This sounds way easier than I expected," she said with open glee. "I've totally got this." She trotted around to her friend and gave Twilight Sparkle a tight hug around the neck. "Thanks, Twilight. You're the best! I mean it!" Her friend returned the hug awkwardly, giving the blue pegasus a reassuring pat on the back.

"Go get him, tiger," she said, gifting her friend with a wistful smile. "Go make some lucky stallion's day."

"I've totally got this," said Rainbow Dash as Twilight Sparkle accompanied her to the door. "I even take back most of the things I've said about non-adventure books being useless!"

"Hey," said Twilight Sparkle, but the pegasus easily dodged her playful wing slap. "Just promise me that you'll introduce me to him as soon as he says 'yes'."

"Twilight, I promise that you will be the first to know when this goes down," agreed Rainbow Dash as she darted out of the room.

Twilight Sparkle closed the door behind her friend and was just turning away when she heard voices on the other side. She hadn't realized that Rainbow had brought anyone with her, and though she respected her friend's privacy, curiosity pulled her head back around to the egress.

She managed to catch a few words like "stop being a chicken" and "just do it, Dashie" before the talkers moved out of hearing range.

"Odd," thought the princess, but she couldn't help feeling a bit giddy and jealous for her friend as she walked slowly back to her reading desk. "Rainbow Dash is in love," she thought. "That's amazing."

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